Monday, May 24, 2010

And the random question this time is...

Paper or briefs?

Excuse me? Paper or briefs? First off, I would love to meet the mind that thought this one up, as they are crazier than I am! No, despite what others might think, I rather enjoy testing my mind against the odd disparity of others. That being said, we can begin seeking the answer!

The first task is to place ourselves in a situation where this becomes a viable question. I suggest we do so in the comfort of our imagination, as we might arouse the curiosity of several people in the neighborhood who have no business knowing what our answer would be. I, for one, have no desire to inform the people whether any environmental consciousness on my part might have lost me my undergarments!

We have two scenarios that comes to mind, let us look at each one individually.

In the first moment of discomfort, you might be making use of the restroom while browsing the sports section. Why? Because it seems that this is the only part of the paper that people feel comfortable exploring while they take care of business. I'm not sure why... maybe people have a habit of pacing while reading the classifieds, which could prove disastrous in such times. Regardless of which, at some point some one walks in on you. You then have only a split second to conceal your bare rump, with only your undies or the World Series score for protection. In this situation, I might suggest the paper. After all, it is already in your hands and if you are not yet finished, redressing could be quite messy.

Now it is later in the office, and you have succumbed to the age old dare of photo-copying your backside on the company printer. While the machine is highlighting your more personal features, your boss enters the room with his/her head turned away for but a moment. You could quickly cover yourself, but your handiwork has printed on top of the report your manager is coming for. Or you have just enough time to grab the physical evidence and though you will be seen, you wonder if you would be able to convince the owner that it never happened and that your boss is just trying to get rid of you.  This one is certainly much tougher, but I think I would grab for the undies in this case. Who knows, maybe I could claim that it wasn't my butt...


Crystal said...

OMFG!! Hysterical!!! I am actually tearing up!

Sports section indeed!